Damn ifThis Is Usdoesnt still know how to unfurl a great, big family mystery.
This is the show at its best: controlled, focused, and emotionally transfixing.
He proposes a family road-trip.
Credit: Ron Batzdorff/NBC
Rebecca, in a quiet, deep pain over the news, declines.
And Kate initially says no, reasonably explaining shes too far away and newly pregnant.
Cut to a few scenes later, where shes on Randalls doorstep.
Let the Big Three road-trip commence.
His brother is alive and, from what we can glean, hes not surprised to see this.
Its worrying enough to spur Jack to finally face whatever happened between them.
The show effectively mines these parallels and contrasts throughout the hour.
So much of the Pearsons experience, across timelines, is unknowable in this episode.
As the siblings arrive, Nickys trailer looks exactly the same as it did some 30 years earlier.
Only when they knock, no ones there to greet them.
Until an adult Nicky played by Griffin Dunne shows up behind them.
He asks the Big Three if their dad knows theyre visiting hes not aware his brother died decades ago.
He absorbs every detail silently like hes taking punches to the gut.
Its wrenching to watch, and Dunne plays it brilliantly.
Songbird Road is also as elegant asThis Is Usgets.
Every time Nicky tries to go deep, Jack rebuffs him.
But the latter meeting is revelatory.
He gives them the basics of his service.
Your father tried to clean me up; it didnt work, he says.
Finally they pulled me out for psychiatric reasons.
He suddenly appears overcome with anguish.
And so we return to Vietnam for the full story.
(It makes sense when you watch it!)
Quickly Nicky develops an affection for him, and so, he decides to take him out fishing.
Indeed a tragically preventable series of events follows.
Nicky gets out another grenade.
The boy tries to grab it from him.
Nicky accidentally detonates it.
And his Jump off!
Nickys able to get off the boat, but the boy is not.
Jack sees the boys shoe in the water and puts the pieces together.
Hes just a kid!
he shouts at Nicky.
Nicky, meanwhile, is paralyzed with shock.
His expression is utterly static as we hear the boys mother sob and scream.
Shes with me, wailing, he says, almost spooked.
I worry that thats going to be the last damn thing I remember when my time comes.
We get one last glimpse of Jacks check-up on Nicky.
The latter does everything he can to tell his brother what happened, but Jack simply wont listen.
I want to leave that right where it is, Jack demands.
He shows Nicky pictures of his family and leaves.
Rebecca asks if him seeing him helped.
A little, maybe, Jack says.
He walked away from the first one.
The reality is, if Nickys to be believed, Jack did turn his back on his brother.
He didnt want to know what happened on that boat.
But Rebecca and perhaps the show doesnt accept that saintly framing anymore.
But now I want the truth.
Nicky kicks the trio out after his unburdening, and Kevin and friends begin the long trip back.
And so, unlike Jack, they turn back.
They knock but find the door creaked open.
Theres Nicky, head bowed, eyes welled.
Theres all that trauma, front and center.
And theres a gun, placed right in front of him.
I never got to tell him it was an accident, Nicky repeats, yet again.
Randall takes the gun.
Kevin puts his hand on Nickys shoulder.
Heres a darker, deeper story than any of them couldve expected.
