Which woman will get the coveted marriage proposal from a literal stranger?
Also, because people like to be on TV.
Fear not, he does have a face.

Credit: Byron Cohen/ABC
(Well get to that later.)
The real stars ofThe Proposal, however, are the women.
Whats impressive aboutThe Proposalis how transparent it is about its contempt for the contestants.

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Nowhere is this more apparent than with this introduction:
Say hello to Kendal Maxwell.
Kendal is a 30-year-old baton twirler from Los Angeles.
(Emphasis mine.)

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After all, as host Jesse Palmer explains, physical compatibility is a large part of falling in love.
Okay, ladies time to bare your souls!
The dealbreaker questions round is upon us!

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How do you feel about dating an amputee?
Needless to say, shes a bit caught off guard.
That said, Morgan pulls it together in time to give a solid answer.

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I believe the soul is what matters, not the physical appearance.
The past relationships question goes to Monica, who says her last breakup made her stronger and more independent.
Poor Kendal gets the obligatory naughty question How physically adventurous are you when it comes to sex?

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Miraculously, she still makes it to the next round!
Weve reached the penultimate round, in which Mikes best friend, Andrew, interviews the remaining three women.
Kendal likes to travel and really experience life, so she doesnt want kids.

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Its ended multiple relationships, she notes sadly.
You are truly doing the Lords work.
Do I even need to tell you that Kendal doesnt make it to the final two?

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So which woman will get the coveted marriage proposal from a literal stranger?
She finishes up with a promo for this season ofThe Bachelorette: So lets do the damn thing!
Can Monica top that?

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I feel like Ive had such a great life, she begins.
But theres one thing thats missing.
[Cue tears] And thats someone like you.
Like Jessica, Monica has someone who needs to approve of this TV transaction: Her dog Toby!
Awwww, poor little guy.
So which woman will Mike choose?
Spoiler alert: He picks the prettier one!
After coming all this way, you really think shes gonna say no?
Monica is all about the follow-through, yall!
Congrats to the happy couple, I guess?
Well, dear readers, that just happened.
What did you think of thisProposal?
Will you be back next week, or is one instantaneous fake engagement enough for your lifetime?
Post your thoughts below!
The Proposalairs Mondays at 10 p.m. on ABC.