Due to the Winter Olympics,Saturday Night Livewas off for an entire month.
Cold Open
The episode began with a take onAnderson Cooper 360, a.k.a.
“But instead, we’ll hear from Donald Trump.”
Credit: NBC
“No one is allowed to have a gun not even whites,” he declares.
“I can only run into so many schools and save everybody.”
Baldwin’s Trump then addressed the departure of White House communications director Hope Hicks.
“She’s like a daughter to me, so smart, so hot,” he said.
“It’s really upsetting to be here tonight,” said the Handsiest Actor nominee.
“I gave out a lot of unwanted massages to my female costars.
Also, I showed an intern my penis and said, ‘Any ideas?'”
“I’m sorry … poor choice of words,” he adds.
“I just mean everyone’s rock-hard to be here.”
“I bit off an intern’s penis,” admitted LeBourge, who worked onThe Shape of Water.
“It was actually my job to get the fish horny.”
And the guy who had to pick out theCall Me By Your Namepeach thought he had a tough gig.
Thompson may have made Rodriguez and Barkley chuckle, but, unfortunately, not us.
Yep, you read that right Barkley’s character was named Ned.
One of those left behind is Jared Kushner, a.k.a.
“It’s been like a never-ending sleepover,” Hicks said to the president’s daughter.
Is he just standing there watching us?’
And it was that moment just stretched out over three years."
Even more disappointing is that America is still left wondering which one is Offset and which one is Takeoff.
And like Kenan Thompson’s bartender, she left us dead.
