She’s back with a new label, a new sound, and a new gig on The Voice.
But all that familiar talent and ferocity?
The following cover story appeared in the Sept. 15 issue of Entertainment Weekly, which you could buyhere.
Credit: Ruven Afanador for EW
Kelly Clarkson walks into a Nashville recording studio and immediately announces that shes hungover.
Not from alcohol, though from NyQuil.
I didnt even get to get drunk.
It bent my tailbone perpendicular to my spine!
she offers before accepting a glass.
As an engineer readies the music, Clarkson blows her nose and apologizes for sounding like a mucous factory.
Im swollen and snotty, but Im very excited, she promises.
This is a grown-ass-womans record, she says.
This isnt a record I could have made at the age of 20.
This is a record you make when youvelived.
Over the next hour and a half, Clarkson, 35, plays almost a dozen new tracks.
I think, 15 years later, Clarkson says, I deserve it.
(Davis has previously acknowledged creative differences but denied sabotage claims.)
Yet the struggles go even deeper than that.
It can be so hard to find the light sometimes.
(RCA declined to comment for this story.)
Clarkson also didnt always get final say over her collaborators.
If you heard the original version, you wouldnt have wanted to record it either, she says.
But I made it work because I didnt want the rest of the album to suffer for that.
[It had become] a bit of an abusive relationship emotionally and mentally, she says.
It starts to make you feel crazy.
Am I being difficult?
You question yourself constantly.
What is happening?'
That country album Clarkson has talked about doing for years?
Kallman was all for it and started suggesting producers.
And Clarksons interest in Broadway?
Kallman arranged for her to make her Atlantic debut with a song onThe Hamilton Mixtape.
I got to showcase all these different sides of me, she says.
Artists never get the opportunity to do that the first time out the gate.
Honestly, youre going to be fine.
I swear to God I wont kill you.
Clarkson has lived in Nashville since 2007.
I literally decided that night and started looking for houses the next day with a Realtor, she says.
I moved here because of a screened-in porch and a really good glass of wine.
But its nice to know youre not alone.
She used to record mostly at night, but now she slots studio time roughly between drop-offs and pickups.
And where she once had to fight to write more songs, Clarkson felt empowerednotto write forMeaning of Life.
Its like, Oh my God, shes really human.'
I dont want my kids to grow up with abandonment issues, she says.
Ive been searching for a family my whole life, because it was just me and my mom.
Its a very important thing for me.
It takes a lot of time to writeyou never know when its going to hit.
I dont want to miss anything with my kids.
Clarkson is the first to admit that anIdolcomeback might be premature.
But really, the choice also came down to her home life.
In recent years, TV talent competitions have struggled to produce stars at Clarksons level.
Yet why Clarkson has succeeded where fewIdolalumni have is something she isnt sure how to answer even now.
I just think its obvious I said what I thought.
Im not a robot.
Another factor is her willingness to do the work and make the sacrifices that longevity requires.
That is not going to bring you happiness.
I dont really care about being famous.
I mean,obviously she gestures toward herself Im not trying to impress anyone.
Im just me, and if you like that, cool.
If you dont, thats totally cool too.
Remy looks on skeptically a few feet away, and Clarkson jokingly offers him some blush too.
When its time for Blackstock to walk me to the door, Clarkson hurries over for one last goodbye.
