Everything changed in Riverdale, but nothing changed, except everything
In case you havent noticed, hes weird.
He doesntfitin and he doesntwantto fit in.
Jason Blossoms body was cold… butsowas the weather.
Credit: Katie Yu/The CW
The Black Hood could strike at any moment… and at the bowling alley,so could Veronica.
You cant blame Jughead, of course.
Never change, Jughead.
THE BAD
Theres a world in which this is easily the No.
1 opener on this list.
This is not that world.
Heres a textbook example of Jugheads over-the-top formula in season 1.
First, mention the phrase the death of Jason Blossom.
Second, exaggerate its major conceptual effect to quasi-hyperbolic degree (It changed everything!).
Look, I dont make the rules; this is just how things are done.
Why does everything have to happen tohim?!
Your town is fictional, babe, but nice try!
THE GOOD
Jugheadloveswhen he can squeeze messy drama out of something.
Case in point: describing basic school hours like an oppressive mandate in a totalitarian dystopia.
This isso dramaticit should hold auditions after school.
Its a fair comparison, and the bloggers of Whoville could onlydreamof making such a connection.
And sometimes Jughead just gets lazy and goes back to his flawed version of this general summary.
Everything is the same!
Nothing is the same!
Short, simple, and fully loaded Jughead at his best.
Thought youd get to see Archie and friends dress up in comic costumes without any of Riverdales constant dread?
ended up being the least insane part of the whole episode.
You might think Jughead defines the word fear every episode, but its only happened once.
Get that AP Lit credit!
Who can say!?!?!?
Atop the list, Jughead closed out season 1 with an evisceration of Jason Blossoms father-slash-assailant.
Clifford Blossom: A twice-dead man, killed first by his own hand and second by Riverdales angry freelancer.
